I'm so tired of war. I'm tired of conflict. I'm tired of feeling like I am in the mud and somebody keeps shoving my face in it, and then woohoo I get a new camera and I forget the mud, and then splurgh, I take a big gulp of it and choke.
Can I be like a child. Can I learn to play despite the tank. Can I learn to be thankful despite the poverty of hope I feel at the moment? Thankful like a child feels for the rest he finds cupped in his pappa's arms? I don't know.
Mi Pappa, help me to see that you are bigger than me, that you can hold my hand, and you can hold me steady when I flail around trying to do my own thing.
I'm so tired of war. I'm tired of conflict. I'm tired of feeling like I am in the mud and somebody keeps shoving my face in it, and then woohoo I get a new camera and I forget the mud, and then splurgh, I take a big gulp of it and choke.
Can I be like a child. Can I learn to play despite the tank. Can I learn to be thankful despite the poverty of hope I feel at the moment? Thankful like a child feels for the rest he finds cupped in his pappa's arms? I don't know.
Mi Pappa, help me to see that you are bigger than me, that you can hold my hand, and you can hold me steady when I flail around trying to do my own thing.
2 Comments:
Matthew,
May the Lord be your shield and banner. This is truly not our home, is it?! That groaning is so deep, and he knows and LOVES - I can't wait to go home.
I'm sorry I missed your calls!! I definitely want to hear about YOU and support stuff! Do you want to talk either tonight (after 7) or tomorrow in the evening any time? I can call you too, if it's easier!
oops, sorry I forgot to sign the above.
love, Rachel wa
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