New Nipples

And a birth announcement First, the Nipples: So, we were sitting down at a little diner just off of Germantown Avenue tonight. I was bouncing Brighton while Amy ate her meal. Then, when Amy was finished, we traded. This is our new date night. Weird. So, we were sitting there just chatting away about Brighton and nursing and giving him the bottle when I say out loud, and without thinking,

"Hon, I'm looking forward to those New Nipples".

Brighton's nursing habits are changing, and the dude nurses faster these days, he needs new nipples for his bottles. Needless to say though, if you were in the booth before or behind us, you might have found my comment a bit awkward if not embarrassing. Use your imaginiation. :) Now the Birth Announcement: I gave birth to my first finished website this morning at 3:00am. Please welcome liberti.org into the wide blue world. Please let me know what you think. I helped my church out with this one, but hopefully this gets me enough exposure, that I might be able to do the next one for $$$ or for trade. For now, I am betting on my pastor taking me out for beer and wings, and that, along with the satisfaction of believing I have made myself useful, is more than enough.

my two men

Aren't they handsome together? Yes, God has at least given me two good lookin' boys, so it's easier to love them when they're annoying...ha, ha ;0) Last night Matthew and I felt like we were starting to get a grasp on being a team in these rough couple of sleep-deprived weeks. We felt like a family, fighting together, as we help Brighton work through his trapped gas and painful cries. It was actually a joy to partner together as a little threesome team and make it through a tough night. As wise friends told us Week One "You will ride this out and make it through"...though we're not "through" yet (the sleepless nights, that is...there's no end to the permanent lifestyle change that's happened, for sure!) we do have more hope and joy in the midst of it all. Here is a picture of the new Pappa Smith feeding his little boy my milk...

Remember

I love my wife. I love my son, but I really love my wife. We are in a really different season. I look at this picture and I feel like I was someone else. Where do we go from here? Jesus, give me strength beyond strength, strength in weakness, to pursue my wife as you pursue us. I would die for her (as long as it entailed incredible glory, or a truly amazing story to tell over a campfire in heaven someday), but the daily dying of washing the toilet, and scrubbing the tub? The daily dying of getting OFF of my computer and the work I love so I can really really listen? That I am going to need Your help with. If any of you all readers (if there are any? :) read this post, please pray that Jesus would move me to love like he does.

Late night redesign.

Amy calls it a bee in the bonnet. I prefer to think of it as a wasp in the helmet. I get going on something like this and I just want to keep going. Ah well, I had fun. I have been learning a lot about web design over the last months and I wanted to have my hand at a few changes. Its still in the works, but let me know what you think.

hanging in there

We went to bible study tonight for the first time since Brighton was born. It was good to see everyone. My friend Geoff was there as usual. He watched me with Brighton. He wrote me this in an email tonight: "Your way with Brighton reminded me of the translation of the prodigal son in our children's bible, "He was filled with tender love for his son." " I wrote him back: "Its 2:41am. I am a raging bull. He wouldn't take a bottle for the second night in a row. I stayed at it with him for over half an hour, trying to coo and woo him into taking it, but he kept crying and crying. He has taken a bottle half a dozen times before. Amy is so tired, she is really exhausted. I wanted so badly to do this for my wife, and even to do this for Brighton. It had been a fulfilling thing to feed him by the bottle, a way I could love him. I am duking it out with my flesh right now, who is duking it out with God, who duked it out with Jesus, so that this angry, sad man can claim his conscience is clean though tonight his burden feels less than light - or is that more than light? I dunno, its 2:45." My friend Geoff loves the gospel. I know that the next time I see him or hear from him he will not necessarily "not think less of me", but that he will likely think more of Jesus for me. I am really thankful for the gospel friendships I have in my life.

Transition

Summer soon moves into autumn. Newborns become infants, and a couple become parents. All these things happen despite ourselves. Amazing. This fall has a lot of transitions for Amy and I. This week I start support raising to go from part-time to full-time at World Harvest Mission. They are paying for 20 hours a week and now its up to me to knock on doors to find out if God will provide $2000 a month for me to step up the amount of work I can do for WHM - which consequently moves us into position to receive benefits, which is good when you have a new baby! All this to say, we covet your prayers as we begin the process. Thanks,-----Matthew

lowercase b

I have a lot of nicknames for Brighton. Last night was one of the best nights we have had so far. Brighton slept right next to Amy virtually all night long, which let her nurse him before he started getting cranky, and then she could even fall asleep while he nursed. It also means he doesn't get moved much, which seems to be a big part of what makes him upset - like his mother in that respect - he sucks at transition! :) I actually had to sleep on the couch last night though, couldn't deal with Brightons occasional gurgle and whine. I might try ear plugs tonight. I had a lot of encouragement from my closest friends and family this week. Father's who really shared their own stories with me, and friends who related from their own weakness. I am beginning to think that there is something to the idea behind the man needing to go hunt for his family during the day. Not just for food, but for sanity, so that he doesn't eat his young! I will probably get some good arguments from some good people to help me keep thinking about that, but in the meantime, that seems to make sense.